Begging Momma Dearest for a Date
by sapphire.gd17
Summary: Scorpius asks his mother out on a date... One-shot. AU where Draco and Hermione are married. OC


**A/N: Tried my hand at writing about Scorpius Malfoy. There is a slight reference to the book The Cursed Child, see if you can spot it! Enjoy! ^^**

"Mom, are you ready?" asked Scorpius. He is dressed impeccably to the nines.

Hermione Malfoy came tottering from the kitchen and raised an eyebrow at him, "Ready for what, honey?"

"Why, a date with your son! You didn't really forget, did you? I reminded you every day for a week!"

"Yes you did, young man," she said, looking at her nails.

"Then why aren't you dressed?" he asked with arms akimbo.

"Because I am NOT going on a date with my son. Who does that?"

"We do! Starting right now…"

"Uh-huh."

"Oh, for the love of Merlin just go get dressed so we could see the movie where everyone gets killed and make way for some apocalyptic mess that everyones gonna try to save but can't!"

"Nice try. You are going to the Yule Ball tonight whether you like it or not. I suffered through it back in the days and YOU are going to suffer through it, end of discussion."

"But I don't wanna go to some lame-o party…" he said trying to go for the puppy look.

"Why in the blazes not?"

"Because I want to spend it with my loving mother instead?"

"Uh-huh, try again."

"Because your son wants to show the world how much he loves his mother by humiliating himself in public?"

"Tough love. Oh, take a looksee, sweetie, your pants are on fire."

"Oh, alright. It's because… we never spend much time toge-"

"Give me a break," she said, not at all flattered. "Now, tell me the truth. What happened with you and Rose?"

Scorpius Malfoy thrust his lips out into a pout and in a heart-wrenching voice said, "We broke up."

His mother rolled her eyes. "How can you break up when you haven't even dated?"

"There is this thing called a silent relationship, mom. Really, it's all the rage nowadays."

"Aww. You still didn't confess to her, for shame, Scorpius, for shame. Your old man didn't raise you to be this passive. Just go ask her out already!"

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"She's dating Albus."

"Cousins don't date each other, Scorpius," Hermione replied drily.

"But he's taking her to the Yule Ball as a plus one!" he raged.

"Probably because she can't go unless someone from the fifth year and up takes her and that someone didn't have the guts to ask her so she settled for going with her cousin."

"Whatever. I'd rather just go on a date with you," he answered stubbornly.

"Do you really?" his mother asked skeptically.

"I do!"

"Why?!"

"Because I love you, mom!" he tried saying in a sincere voice. " Mark my words, I'm going to be the world's sweetest son who'll take you out for dinner once a decade, massage your feet once in this lifetime and hug you every week for free!"

"See? How can my baby never confess like that to a certain freckly, red-headed young girl when he does such a wonderful job confessing his love to his mom?"

"Because whenever I see her, words desert me! My lips get all dry and I say the wrong things. I actually told her that she smells like bread for Pete's sake!"

"Smells like a bread?!" she laughed. "Oh, baby, you are totally screwed!"

"Mom, watch your language around me, I am the kid you should worry about hearing bad things like that!"

"You are a grown man, Scorpius. Lighten up a bit."

"DAD! MOM JUST USED A BAD WORD IN FRONT OF ME!" Scorpius hollered in the general direction of his dad's home office.

Draco's voice came floating from upstairs, "HUH? WHAT?! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"

"I SAID, MOM-"

"-alright, alright!I'll go on a date with you! Don't go ratting me out to your dad like that, it's not cool!" Hermione quickly yeilded. " Wait for me here, I'll just go get my coat."

"Oh, yeah!" he crowed and gave himself a high five.

Draco came downstairs where Scorpius is to see what's going on.

"Did you call me Scorpius?" he asked.

"Uh, actually mom and I were just going out on a mother-son date, I was just telling you," Scorpius told him.

"Since when do you two go on mother-son dates?"

"Since now, dad."

"How come you and I don't do that?"

"Because it's weird. You and I should go to quidditch matches together but never on a dinner- or the movies."

"What's weird about you and me having dinner?"

"It's just not done, dad. It's like the sacred agreement between fathers and sons. Let's uphold that tradition."

"Well I say no to that shit. Let's have dinner tomorrow, just you and I. We can talk about girls and stuff you like," Draco insisted.

"MOM, DAD JUST USED A BAD WORD IN FRONT OF HIS PRECIOUS SON!"

"Oh, alright, alright!" Draco quickly backtracked. " Don't tell on me, Scorpius. I promise not to take you out to dinners alone, alright?"

"I love you, dad."

"Yeah, yeah. Have fun with your mom. Just take her home before curfew."

"Dad, mom is an adult. She doesn't have a curfew."

"Well now she does. I won't have her out of my sight for no longer than five hours."

"Dad, you spend time together every single day!"

"And I would spend every single day with her for a million years more."

"You have it bad, dad. It's freakin' unbelievable."

"Language, son!" scolded Draco and Hermione, who appeared just at the right moment after getting her coat, together.

"Oh, hi darling," Hermione said to Draco. "Finished with work yet?"

"Nah, still have stacks of paper to finish. You look great, by the way," Draco said, appreciating her outfit.

"Ugh. Dad, mom just put a coat on."

"Well, I think she's very beautiful."

"You say that every time, dad."

"Oh, thanks darling," Hermione said and gave Draco a peck on the lips. "Now, young man," she said, shifting her attention to Scorpius, "where do you want to go?"

"Actually, now I'm thinking of going to the Yule Ball with you," Scorpius suggested like it wasn't his first intention all along.

"What kind of sons has their mothers as dates for school dances?" Hermione asked, taken aback by his son's proposition.

"The sweetest ones!" was the oh-so-helpful reply.

"I won't have you stealing my wife, Scorpius!" Draco protested.

"Oh, for the love of god just ask Rose out already! Why do you have to make me suffer through this?" Hermione asked her son, raising her hands in confusion.

"No, no, its not as weird as you'd think!" Scorpius quickly said, "All you have to do is drink this polyjuice potion and you will look like Nina Dobrev!"

"Are you really planning on using your own mother to make Rose jealous?" Hermione asked, flabbergasted.

"Er- maybe?"

"Scorpius, what kind of sick joke is this?" his father asked. "Hermione, darling, I think he read to many books, its practically addling his mind!"

"Oh, come on!" Scorpius insisted, " Mom, Uncle Harry and Uncle Ron did it all the time when they were kids!"

"You really shouldn't believe the wild tales your uncle Ron tells you all the time!" Hermione said while sweating a bit. "You said you wanted to watch a movie. Let's do that instead! Let's go watch someone get killed!"

"Yeah, son. Watch a murder movie with your mom or I'll personally ask Rose to the dance on your behalf," his father threateningly offered.

"Don't embarrass me like that, dad!" he said, mortified and a bit uneasy. She might fall for him instead!

"Then go ask her out yourself!" Draco responded, challenging him to man up.

"Oh, alright! I'll go ask her out and if she says no, I'll be taking mom-slash-Nina Dobrev out to the ball instead, agreed? And you probably should hold me tight while I cry silently like a man."

"I'll bring tissues," his mom promised. "Where did you even get Nina Dobrev's hair?"

"Oh, please. I'd be back within an hour."

Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy didn't wait for him and fled towards the nearest luxurious hotel in town.

Before midnight, a letter came to the hotel from Scorpius.

Hermione, (with Nina Dobrev's face on) who was dancing with Draco (with Ian Somerhaulder's face on) untied the letter from the school owl and read it in a loud voice, " _Mom, Dad, Rose said yes! She said she was waiting for me to ask her out and when I didn't, she went with Albus even though a lot of older guys asked her first, so I wouldn't think that she's interested in them! Thanks for pressuring me into asking her out. You're the best! P.S. Mom, you aren't getting out of our movie date, and dad, I still won't go on a dinner with you alone but I can watch movies with you provided we never go out of the house, agreed?"_

"Aww, I knew Rose can't resist my lovely boy!" Nina told Ian proudly.

Ian, who was reading the letter while hugging Nina from her back, smiled and said, "You know who else is lovely? You, my delicious human! Come and give your vampire some sugar…"

-end-


End file.
